"I don't want to go in there," Billy said, digging the toes of his dirty sneakers into the gravel of the parking lot.
"Lets go," his mother dragged Billy into his private writing lessons. "But she keeps staring at my feet. She has a thing for cheap shoes. Didn't you see what she made me write about last week? And she keeps wiggling her toes at me."
"Well, Billy, let’s just get through this. Maybe the next story won't be a shoe thing. Miss Susan is just working through this obsessive, compulsive, ugly, cheap shoe disorder"
"Mom, can we go to the Incredible Pizza Company when I'm done?
"Yes," his mother replied. "But first, I need to stop by Payless."
With the most incredible boots ever already on her feet - a one-of-a-kind pair she had shoplifted from Dillard's - Melinda pranced into the shoe store with Billy in tow.
Melinda eyed some red cowboy boots and a pair of satin-trimmed, toe-pinching pumps that were on sale while Billy tried to make himself and his dirty sneakers inconspicuous.
"Mom!"
"What, Billy?"
"MOM!" Billy said in a loud whisper.
"WHAT?" Melinda, snapped.
"That lady, at the cash register, keeps taking your picture and calling someone on her cell phone. A bunch of times."
"She's just taking pictures of my sexy boots and telling her friends about them," Melinda said, prancing about so the clerk would get a variety of photo angles.
Billy looked up at his mother and asked: "When can I have shoes people want to photograph?"
Melinda stopped prancing and said to Billy: “You can have shoes people want to photograph when pigs fly. There's only room in this family for one Shoe Queen," Melinda sneared. "And, that's ME!"
When it came to shoes, Melinda was the Imelda Marcos of Springfield, Missouri. Shoe Queen Melinda either pretended or, indeed, did not notice the tears running down Billy's cheeks.
She came to a halt (in a perfect shoe pose) when she noticed her husband and two security guards standing next to the clerk with the cell phone.
Her husband, Alexander, was a man with a shoe fetish so he and Melinda were the perfect pair. (Writer's note: Get it, perfect pair! ha!)
Alexander turned toward Melinda and Billy and said: "My little Shoe Queen, the bank seized our home yesterday; I was laid off today; soon we will have no place to store your enormous shoe collection. The doctor just called with our little Billy's test results."
Billy is living in the garage since his mom turned his bedroom into a stylish California Closets shoe room."OK, OK, let me just get this pair of sexy boots before they cut off my credit cards."
"Honey, I'm going to have to put my foot down," said her husband, Alexander. "The doctor says our little Billy needs corrective footwear."
Melinda paused from shoe shopping for a moment and glanced at Billy's dirty sneakers. She turned to Alexander and screeched: "He doesn't need new shoes. Only his big toes are sticking out. When his pinkie toes break through, he can have new shoes."
Alexander took a look at the sexy boots Melinda was eyeing, then at Billy's shoddy sneakers before nodding in agreement. "You're right, my precious Shoe Queen. No new shoes for Billy. But you, my dearest, can have all the shoes you want, especially sexy boots."
Alexander's infatuation with Melinda's feet and the shoes upon them was stronger than his paternal bond with Billy.
And that was just fine. Billy knew that as long as his parents kept their heads down, focused on their feet and footwear fetish, they would never see what was coming.
Billy had a plan - a get-rich-quick plan - that would leave his inattentive, shoe-freak parents' heads' spinning. He and Susan, his private writing tutor, had worked out all the details. Billy, who would celebrate his 35th birthday next week, and Susan, a drop-dead gorgeous brunette with impeccable taste in shoes, were going to open an eBay store selling his mother’s multitude of forgotten shoes.
Billy and Susan had both been accepted into medical school and were using the eBay shoe sales to pay for their first year.
Enough money was coming into their PayPal account to fill Susan's sock drawers. Susan had a sock fetish matched only by Melinda's shoe fetish. Susan, in fact, had enough socks to some day fulfill her dream of giving a pair of socks to every homeless child she examined at the free clinic. The free clinic that some day she and Billy would open.
Still, you meet some pretty peculiar PayPal people on eBay. Like that one buyer that asked if the shoes had ever been worn, because she was really only interested in buying secondhand Crocs.
She loved Crocs and couldn’t live without wearing a different pair each day! But on one occasion, she had really put her foot in it, when she realized she was wearing a pink Croc on her left foot and purple on her right. She thought back to getting dressed that morning and was sure she'd worn matching shoes but her memory of the hours after were foggy.
Maybe Billy was drugging her so he could secretly donate all her Crocs to "Doc Without Crocs," the international relief effort to smuggle the clunky footwear back into the country of origin.
At least he had inherited his mothers excellent taste in footwear.
"Lets go," his mother dragged Billy into his private writing lessons. "But she keeps staring at my feet. She has a thing for cheap shoes. Didn't you see what she made me write about last week? And she keeps wiggling her toes at me."
"Well, Billy, let’s just get through this. Maybe the next story won't be a shoe thing. Miss Susan is just working through this obsessive, compulsive, ugly, cheap shoe disorder"
"Mom, can we go to the Incredible Pizza Company when I'm done?
"Yes," his mother replied. "But first, I need to stop by Payless."
With the most incredible boots ever already on her feet - a one-of-a-kind pair she had shoplifted from Dillard's - Melinda pranced into the shoe store with Billy in tow.
Melinda eyed some red cowboy boots and a pair of satin-trimmed, toe-pinching pumps that were on sale while Billy tried to make himself and his dirty sneakers inconspicuous.
"Mom!"
"What, Billy?"
"MOM!" Billy said in a loud whisper.
"WHAT?" Melinda, snapped.
"That lady, at the cash register, keeps taking your picture and calling someone on her cell phone. A bunch of times."
"She's just taking pictures of my sexy boots and telling her friends about them," Melinda said, prancing about so the clerk would get a variety of photo angles.
Billy looked up at his mother and asked: "When can I have shoes people want to photograph?"
Melinda stopped prancing and said to Billy: “You can have shoes people want to photograph when pigs fly. There's only room in this family for one Shoe Queen," Melinda sneared. "And, that's ME!"
When it came to shoes, Melinda was the Imelda Marcos of Springfield, Missouri. Shoe Queen Melinda either pretended or, indeed, did not notice the tears running down Billy's cheeks.
She came to a halt (in a perfect shoe pose) when she noticed her husband and two security guards standing next to the clerk with the cell phone.
Her husband, Alexander, was a man with a shoe fetish so he and Melinda were the perfect pair. (Writer's note: Get it, perfect pair! ha!)
Alexander turned toward Melinda and Billy and said: "My little Shoe Queen, the bank seized our home yesterday; I was laid off today; soon we will have no place to store your enormous shoe collection. The doctor just called with our little Billy's test results."
Billy is living in the garage since his mom turned his bedroom into a stylish California Closets shoe room."OK, OK, let me just get this pair of sexy boots before they cut off my credit cards."
"Honey, I'm going to have to put my foot down," said her husband, Alexander. "The doctor says our little Billy needs corrective footwear."
Melinda paused from shoe shopping for a moment and glanced at Billy's dirty sneakers. She turned to Alexander and screeched: "He doesn't need new shoes. Only his big toes are sticking out. When his pinkie toes break through, he can have new shoes."
Alexander took a look at the sexy boots Melinda was eyeing, then at Billy's shoddy sneakers before nodding in agreement. "You're right, my precious Shoe Queen. No new shoes for Billy. But you, my dearest, can have all the shoes you want, especially sexy boots."
Alexander's infatuation with Melinda's feet and the shoes upon them was stronger than his paternal bond with Billy.
And that was just fine. Billy knew that as long as his parents kept their heads down, focused on their feet and footwear fetish, they would never see what was coming.
Billy had a plan - a get-rich-quick plan - that would leave his inattentive, shoe-freak parents' heads' spinning. He and Susan, his private writing tutor, had worked out all the details. Billy, who would celebrate his 35th birthday next week, and Susan, a drop-dead gorgeous brunette with impeccable taste in shoes, were going to open an eBay store selling his mother’s multitude of forgotten shoes.
Billy and Susan had both been accepted into medical school and were using the eBay shoe sales to pay for their first year.
Enough money was coming into their PayPal account to fill Susan's sock drawers. Susan had a sock fetish matched only by Melinda's shoe fetish. Susan, in fact, had enough socks to some day fulfill her dream of giving a pair of socks to every homeless child she examined at the free clinic. The free clinic that some day she and Billy would open.
Still, you meet some pretty peculiar PayPal people on eBay. Like that one buyer that asked if the shoes had ever been worn, because she was really only interested in buying secondhand Crocs.
She loved Crocs and couldn’t live without wearing a different pair each day! But on one occasion, she had really put her foot in it, when she realized she was wearing a pink Croc on her left foot and purple on her right. She thought back to getting dressed that morning and was sure she'd worn matching shoes but her memory of the hours after were foggy.
Maybe Billy was drugging her so he could secretly donate all her Crocs to "Doc Without Crocs," the international relief effort to smuggle the clunky footwear back into the country of origin.
At least he had inherited his mothers excellent taste in footwear.
The End!
Join the group and add to the stories! Contributing authors: Susan Wade, Patsy Bell Hobson, Melinda Arnold and RoseMarie Combrinck Coetzee
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